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OPINIONS

Parental Guidance

The Corner

ALEX FERGUSON

I hate the scottish pox for doing an Elmer Fudd impression every time he is interviewed.

ANDREAS MöLLER

For his little walkabout in Euro 96.

DAVID PLATT

For single-handedly destroying Forest.

SIR ALEX FERGUSON

Why? So many reasons.



The Heroes

DANNY ROSE

For taking just ten minutes to achieve a career highlight.

DIEGO MARADONA

For being better than Pele but not selling his soul to Fifa on his retirement, for that second goal against England in '86 and the one against Belgium in the Semi Final that was nearly as good but most of all, for being as mad as a box of frogs and showing that fatboys can still play a bit.

PETER BEARDSLEY

Never had a shocker.

STUART PEARCE

In the words of someone smarter than me, for being "basically nothing but one massive heart on a sleeve".



The Rules

COLOURED BOOTS

Sunday league footballers - never wear coloured boots unless you are SURE you are the best player in your team (and others agree with you).

BIG HEADPHONES

Football players - when getting off your team coach, make sure you're wearing a massive pair of headphones, to further insulate you from the real world..

JUMPERS FOR GOALPOSTS

The more loudly you celebrate your goal, the more it was definitely in..

PARKS FOOTBALL

Never wear full matching kit to a kickabout.



The Board

ONE NIGHT IN TURIN

Last night i went to the Press screening of One Night in Turin, it's a film based on the excellent book "All Played Out" by Pete Davies.